Having a baby in UAE: #TheStoryOfHarper

hash·tag

ˈhaSHtaɡ/

noun (on social media sites such as Twitter) a word or phrase preceded by a hash or pound sign (#) and used to identify messages on a specific topic.


So you're telling me that I need to create a hashtag for my baby daughter? OK, I'll do it.

In this very weird world consumed by social media and the debilitating disorder of FoMO ("fear of missing out"), I felt the only responsible and humane thing to do was create a hashtag for my baby so friends and family could be aided while they scour the Internet for images and videos of baby Harper.

And so, on September 5, 2015, at precisely 7.23pm, which was approximately five and half hours after my daughter was born, the hashtag #TheStoryOfHarper entered the world wide web (a.k.a. www) and of course, the Internet has never been the same.

Realizing that your baby daughter needs a hashtag is the first step. Congratulations, you've already made it this far. The next very important task is determining what the actual hashtag will be. How will it represent your new baby? Will it go viral? How long before it's trending on Twitter (*fingers crossed)?

In our experience, these were some early front-runners:

#OurLittleAngel

#MyPoopyPrincess

#PrettyInPink

#TheCutestFreakingBabyInTheWholeEntireWorld

Surprisingly enough, all those hashtags and many more like them, were already nabbed by other social media-hungry and over-obsessive parents. What a bunch of jerks.

In the end, we settled on #TheStoryOfHarper. Because, basically, we thought it sounded cool. It appears the good people on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram agree.

For any expecting parents in or around the UAE: If you have any direct questions about what it was like to give birth in Abu Dhabi, the different hospital options, doctors, the access to drugs, birth certificate shenanigans, etc. please send me an email (aarongray2337@gmail.com) and I will respond promptly. Trust me, we know what it's like to not get straight-forward answers from trained professionals here. All I can do is tell you exactly how our situation played out and offer my wholehearted advice. Cheers.

Having a baby in UAE: A letter to my daughter

Dearest Harper,

Looking back on my life, I really cannot remember the last time I cried.

Sure there have been a few times here and there: a sad funeral, a triumphant ending to a dramatic movie or when the New York Giants blow a six-point lead with less than two minutes to go. But all those examples registered slight emotional reactions, in the grand scheme of things.

When I was there to watch your global debut on September 5, 2015 and when I heard you crying before I could even see you, it changed me forever. In a very astonishing way.

You always hear about how men claim that the day their children were born was the best day of their lives. Rather cliche, I know. But for me, I can now relate.

Trust me, I will never forget that moment. For the rest of my days, there will always be an obvious reason for celebration on September 5th.

Because that is when my second life began. My life with Harper.

I never knew I could love something so much. I just never knew I had it in me. You have been alive for only two weeks but your impact on me has already been immeasurable.

But like I said before, when I heard you cry for the very first time, I immediately started to cry. Uncontrollably. Indeed, it was a very beautiful moment. So much so that -- according to my sources -- the other nurses in the room started to weep when they saw me get emotional.

It was proof that everything was now different and nothing would ever be the same. Ever. And because that was so obvious to me at that exact moment, I was very:

- excited
- happy
- overwhelmed
- optimistic
- proud

And when I experience all those emotions at one time -- trust me, it does not happen often -- my heart starts to swell and the waterworks come down. I'll admit it: only you and your amazing mother have that kind of effect on me.

So now that we have established your father will forever be completely wrapped around your finger, allow me to offer some concrete reassurance that will last for a lifetime. Harper, I will always be by your side. For good or ill, and even after my clock runs out, know this: your dad loves you.

And perhaps down the line, when you are old enough, you will read this. Then we can talk and reflect on that special day we shared together. After all, having children is a beautiful thing and it should be celebrated.

These are precious moments right now. I know this and sincerely appreciate it. But eventually you will begin to walk and begin to talk and then, you will grow up to become one of the most delightful people I have ever known.

I look forward to those days as I look forward to our life together. Now if you will, please excuse me while I wipe the tears off my keyboard.

With all my love,
Dad

For any expecting parents in or around the UAE: If you have any direct questions about what it was like to give birth in Abu Dhabi, the different hospital options, doctors, the access to drugs, birth certificate shenanigans, etc. please send me an email (aarongray2337@gmail.com) and I will respond promptly. Trust me, we know what it's like to not get straight-forward answers from trained professionals here. All I can do is tell you exactly how our situation played out and offer my wholehearted advice. Cheers.

Having a baby in UAE: Introducing Harper Gray

Miranda and I would like you to meet our daughter Harper Sharon Gray, who came into this world on Saturday, September 5th and brought nothing but love with her. She weighed in at 7 pounds, 6 ounces and measured at 52cm long. She and mommy are healthy, happy and absolutely adorable.

Obviously, she is our newest obsession. We could not be happier and we are looking forward to the new and exciting challenge of parenthood in a foreign country.

Our little angel was conceived in Goa, India and actually visited six different countries while in the womb. Kind of sets the bar for what we can only hope will be an enriching and adventurous life full of travel and amazing experiences.

I'm going to cut this short (well, shorter than most of my blog posts) and get back to staring at my daughter while she sleeps. Soaking up all the love is our new favourite pastime.

For any expecting parents in or around the UAE: If you have any direct questions about what it was like to give birth in Abu Dhabi, the different hospital options, doctors, the access to drugs, birth certificate shenanigans, etc. please send me an email (aarongray2337@gmail.com) and I will respond promptly. Trust me, we know what it's like to not get straight-forward answers from trained professionals here. All I can do is tell you exactly how our situation played out and offer my wholehearted advice. Cheers.

Emirates Post in Abu Dhabi is amazing!

We are expecting our baby daughter to arrive this month so the constant flow of generous gifts arriving from our friends and family overseas has been very special.

But the mail and/or package delivery system in this country is a hard nut to crack.

You see, in the grand land of the UAE, normal citizens do not enjoy the luxury of personal mailboxes at the end of the driveway. What's a driveway, you ask. Good question. The days of the suburban mailman running away from the barking dog are over.

You are not in Kansas anymore.

Most expats just use the PO Box address at their office of employment for mail delivery. But when doing that, you are now at their mercy and it can be a frustrating endeavour.

The postage workers at The National are nice guys, when you can actually catch them. During Ramadan, they were almost non-existent. But now, they usually "work" from about 10am until around 4pm. I work evenings and arrive at my office around 4pm so it has been a cat-and-mouse game with them for the last few weeks.

Actual text message dialogue with a colleague from work:

Me: Hey mate, let's say I want to mail an envelope, do you think our office manager or someone in the office post desk can sell me a stamp and put it in the outgoing mail?

Esteemed colleague: No.

Me: Wow, just no? That's it? No recourse...

EC: Emirates Post, bro.

Me: Just for a simple envelope? So you're telling me I have to drive into town, find parking, probably wait in lines and potentially lose my sh*t just for a UAE stamp?

EC: Yep.

Me: That seems logical. Oh yea, what's that? Logic? I threw that right out the window when I moved here, right? Thanks for the info. But if you will now excuse me, I have to designate what surely will be a 45-minute ordeal toward the simple and mundane task of mailing an envelope.

EC: You're weird, bro.

When Miranda and I pulled into the Emirates Post parking lot, we were shocked to find a spot very close to the door. VIP parking for VIPP (very important and pregnant people).

Emirates Post is a pretty big building with lots of intricate, smaller offices inside of it. It's also where you go to get your Emirates ID and plenty of other "just moving here" tasks.

They take the DMV approach: to limit human exchange, you push a button, get a ticket, have a seat and then patiently wait for your number to appear on the small electrical screens above each faithful and understanding government worker.

It helps to arrive with a beautiful woman. Aside from the gawking stares she will receive from seemingly bored men just waiting for their number to be called, you will also get to enjoy your own waiting area and soak up some more VIPP luxury.

The wait wasn't too long. About 15 minutes. Our guy weighed my simple envelope, we briefly negotiated the postage price and as soon as I licked and applied the stamps, he tossed the envelope over his shoulder -- without looking -- and it fell into a basket marked "standard delivery".

And just like that, the long journey for that simple little envelope had begun.

Before we were about to leave, I asked if he possibly had any packages addressed to me. My packages are supposed to come to my office but once they arrive in the UAE, things seem to slow down and packages bound for my office will marinate at Emirates Post for days or even weeks.

Sure enough, a special package from Texas addressed to yours truly had been collecting dust there since Ramadan. We were thrilled with this news, which resulted in a high-five between husband and pregnant wife.

We came to Emirates Post not knowing what to expect with a mere envelope in our hands. We left with a big package full of new baby clothes in tow and with a victorious smile on our faces.

It truly was a UAE success story.

Goodness, gracious Great Wall of China

Since my amazing wife and I are expecting our first child in late August, we have put our foot on the gas and accelerated our travel plans.

Not because life ends when a baby comes into the picture.

No sir. Quite the opposite, really.

Since this beautiful baby bump has emerged on my beautiful wife, our daughter-to-be has officially traveled to five different countries already ... FIVE! While growing up in America, I didn't even flirt with Europe until college. Oy!

But for our sweet baby, she has already hit India, Thailand, the UAE, the United States and we just added China to the list. Quite the world traveler this one...

We have set the bar high so when she officially joins our clan, we can only imagine that she will have the thirst for travel my wife and I already share. We have a Baby Bjorn and we plan on using it.

During this latest endeavor, we visited our great friend Anna in Beijing for five days. There were daily flights to China's capital via Etihad and since Anna works for Kempinski Hotels, we had a great place to stay during our visit.

But to be honest, our main goal for this little getaway was just to experience a new culture. I mean half the planet lives there so we really had to see this place for ourselves. Our Chinese visas were stamped, we had Baby Gray in tow and we made sure to hit all the sights.

There was Tiananmen Square, the Forbidden City, plenty of dumplings to eat, along with some Pekking Duck and to top it all off: Goodness, gracious, the Great Wall of China!

Preparing for a baby in the UAE: Is my life over?

Shit just got real.

For me, baby apparel that actually goes on my body takes things to a whole new level. That's our friend Meagan strapping a Baby Bjorn to my chest. Sigh...

If you haven't heard already, my amazing wife Miranda is a little over 19 weeks pregnant and for the last few months, the limited free space in our one-bedroom apartment has become more and more limited.

Baby stuff is starting to mount with a very present momentum as our storage space has become consumed by a baby crib, stroller, sink bath tub, and plenty of other baby accessories.

But where am I going to store my camping gear? What about my mountain bike? More importantly, where the hell am I going to put my pool table?

I know what you're saying: Get ready big daddy, things are about to change in your simple little life. So let the freakout begin!

Thank goodness, there is proper prose for men that are in my current situation. Trust me, I have read plenty of the traditional "So you're going to be a parent -- get ready for your life to end" books. They are scattered along my desk at home, they sit on my bedside table and I even have one next to the toilet.

But the best book I have read so far is this one:

"Be Prepared: A Practical Handbook for New Dads" by Gary Greenberg and Jeannie Hayden has restored my confidence, calmed some of my fears and exposed me to some great tips such as:

- how to change a diaper at a packed stadium
- create a decoy drawer full of old wallets, remote controls and cell phones to throw baby off the scent of your real gear
- construct an emergency diaper out of a towel, a sock and duct tape

It could use an update, however, based on the dated technology references to VCRs and pagers. But reading about that stuff usually makes for a good laugh and proves that fathers-to-be have also been freaking out since as far back at the early 1990's.

Books help. Friends offer great words of encouragement. But the fact remains...

We are having a baby. In the United Arab Emirates. What the hell are we thinking?

Buy the ticket; take the ride.

We're having a baby

When you have some big news to deliver, sometimes a phone call will not do it justice. Especially when you live on the other side of the world.

Instead, why not mail a special package to your loved ones and ask them to skype while they open it? That way, you can capture their reactions to the surprise on video and celebrate with everyone at the same time.

Miranda and I did just that and this is what happened...




Yes, it's official. Our lovely home in Abu Dhabi will be gaining another. He or she is expected in late August and we could not be more excited.

I am humbled to become a father and just overjoyed that this special lady, who decided to take a huge leap and move with me to the UAE over two years ago, is about to become the mother of my child.

It's always fun to look back. I still remember the day she arrived at the airport and I knew then that my life would never be the same again. I even wrote about it.

Now a baby is on the horizon. And we could not be happier.

Love is definitely blossoming in the desert.